For sure not ham or deviled eggs, because my family inhales cloven-hooved beast and mayonnaise like it’s oxygen.
But, rather, Easter leftovers like this:
I hoarded my kids’ Easter egg dye in their thousand individual cups in the kitchen sink until Mr. Dude nearly had a seizure over the inconvenience of it all. Because I had a plan. And I’ll be a filthy, nasty Peep if it wasn’t all worth it.
Wool is fucking amazing. I said it. For lots of reasons. But where vinegar-based Easter egg dyes are concerned, it especially amazes me. When exposed to heat, the wool will absorb all the color from the liquid dye, and leave clear water behind. Seriously, all the color gets sucked from the solution into the yarn, right before your eyes. I am shocked every time I do it. You might not be so impressionable. I forgive you. We can probably still drink beer together.
I soaked my carefully skeined natural-colored (ivory) wool sock yarn in warmish water to get all the fibers evenly wet, and squeezed out the excess water, gently so it wouldn’t do that dreadlocky thing wool does that isn’t amazing at all unless you’re doing it on purpose. Then I covered my kitchen table with enough plastic wrap to keep the dye from pissing off Mr. Dude even more. I laid the wet yarn on the wrap, and poured the dye over it however the hell I wanted to.
I wrapped the plastic wrap around the yarn to keep the colors where I wanted them, and whacked the whole thing into the microwave for 3 or 4 minutes, until the water in the wrap was clear. WHICH TRIPS ME OUT, NO END. And this is what remained after a gentle rinse to get the vinegar out and a quick dry in the spring sunshine:
It’s like a Grateful Dead concert, the Easter bunny, and a sheep had a 3-way baby. Thanks PAAS!
This should also work on any other animal-derived, or protein, fiber — such as silk, angora, alpaca, mohair, and nylon. I say go hunt in your closet, craft bin, or alleyway thrift store drop-off for suitable fibers and go sick. Just kidding, enter the thrift store and actually purchase something with money. Scullywag.
(If you forgot to irritate the shit out of your life partner by saving leftover sour-reeking dye in the kitchen sink for days, use food coloring in about a cup of water with a tablespoon or two of vinegar and have at it.)
Happy Easter everyone!
P.S. For reals, go do it – and tell me in the comments how it turned out!